It’s no secret that having twins is difficult. I’ve talked about it in my previous posts and will continue to talk about it until it’s no longer a struggle….so you’ll probably hear about it as long as I have this little blog.
When we found out I was expecting twins I had a real heart-to-heart with God. I told Him that I knew I could handle it because He never gives us more than we can handle but that I really couldn’t deal with colicky babies. I asked Him to spare me the crying/screaming fits and prayed for babies that were like my Lucas (the absolute DREAM baby!).
Well, that just hasn’t been the case. Yes I’ve had a few good nights and the girls aren’t always bad, but more often than not I am not getting much sleep and it has been wearing down on me. Last night, as Livia was starting up with her crying match for the evening (they like to take turns and it was apparently Livia’s night on crying duty) I started crying. Jesse was rubbing my back as I had tears run down my face and he asked me why I was crying.
I told him I was so angry with God. I had prayed for babies that didn’t scream/cry and here He gave me babies that DID. I was angry that the night before I prayed for rest and the girls were up almost every 2 hrs with at least one that just wouldn’t settle in between. After the tears and Livia fell asleep, I ended up getting 3.5-4hrs between feedings. The girls would eat and then go right back to sleep.
He heard my prayers.
The thing is. I know He’s always been listening. There is some reason He didn’t give me rest the other night. There is a reason He has given me these girls. I just have to keep giving it all to Him and know that there is a purpose & a plan.
I will say that I have the absolute best husband in the world though. He is bending over backwards to make my life easier. I absolutely adore that man and couldn’t imagine going through this crazy time without him by my side.
Have you ever found that you prayed for something and it didn’t seem answered/heard?